The Pain Pay Off

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Hello, lovely people, thank you for stopping by to read my blog. I have a question for all of you who suffer with chronic pain, migraines, fibromyalgia, seizures etc. Do you experience The Pain Pay Off? What I mean by this is, whilst most of you will be in pain pretty much all of the time, if you’re feeling a bit better and you attempt to do something, do you know there will be consequences later??

FF The Pain Pay Off
The Pain Pay Off – will what I do today impact on me tomorrow?

 

You see that’s pretty much my life. I am in pain constantly and sometimes there is nothing more that I can do other than curl up, in bed, in a darkened room, waiting for the acute pain to settle into something more manageable. When that’s not the case I try to pace myself through the day, carrying out small tasks with rests in between bouts of activity.

 

The problem is there is no way of knowing if there while be a price to pay later – The Pain Pay Off. No matter how hard I try to pace myself and ‘not overdo things’ sometimes my body says “enough” and just starts to shut down. This can be in the form of a migraine, back spasm, pain or more recently a seizure. It is sooo frustrating!!! I have a million and one things I’d love to do in my head and in reality I’m fortunate if I get the ‘and one’ thing done.

The Pain Pay Off - medication and bed rest!
The Pain Pay Off – medication and bed rest!

The Pain Pay Off can also be really random. What I can do on one day doesn’t mean I can do the same thing on any other day and ‘get away with it’. This makes planning virtually impossible.

FF Woman in the dark in pain.
The Pain Pay Off – some days are about getting through each hour at a time.

So how do I deal with it? To be honest sometimes I don’t deal with it very well. I cry and feel like life is very unfair and get cross at my body for letting me down. Come on, I used to be able to run 10 miles – where did that girl go??

FF Woman behind rainy window
The Pain Pay Off – running may be over but determination remains.

Othertimes I just have to accept that this has become the new ‘normal’ for me. Focus on all the positives in my life; my hubby, our 3 gorgeous children, my amazing family and friends. And then there’s God. It’s not always easy holding onto your Faith when you’re hurting. But I know He understands. He loves and accepts me just as I am – that really helps.

Practically, unless I have a migraine, I use distraction techniques; playing Solitaire on my phone, watching a film, reading through my Bloglovin’ feed. It can be hard to concentrate though if the pain is bad.

As for the seizures, well they kinda mess everything up. My body acts on it’s own, it jerks and contorts and I just have to try and concentrate on my breathing, until the seizure has passed. I know I will hurt afterwards. The Pain Pay Off┬áis still there, it’s just a result of my body jarring itself, rather than because I’ve chosen to do something. That’s so not fair, but it is real and it is my life at the moment.

Do you have to deal with pain?

Is there a Pain Pay Off that you know to expect should you chose to undertake an activity?

How do you deal with The Pain Pay Off?

Sammie x

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